The Dark Knight Rises Review
A film of many surprises.
This film did indeed surprise me in many ways, both positive and negative. There were aspects I expected to suck that exceeded all my expectations. Then there were aspects I thought were going to rule that ended up sucking. There were also stealth surprises, in that aspects of the movie I had no opinion of one way or another jumped up and bit me on the ass.
The big positive surprise was Anne Hathaway as Catwoman. I have said several times that I didn’t think she could really play either the Cat or Selina Kyle. I didn’t think she had the role in her. I could not have been more wrong. She inhabits the role like she plans to raise six generations of Hathaways there and more or less dominates every scene she is in. Her portrayal is superlative and I honestly will have a hard time seeing anyone else in the role. Also, I have always had a thing for her (even when she was doing garbage like One Day I found her a real turn on) and no matter what she is doing in this movie she is dead sexy.
The big negative surprise was Bane. I really expected to like him as a villain but honestly found him to be really kind of boring. He suffers in comparison to the Joker in the Dark Knight of course, but even without that bar to hold up I would have found him boring and two dimensional. His plan seems vague and a little pointless, and he just doesn’t have the dialog and compelling nature of even Two Face or Scarecrow from the other movies. He more or less translates as slightly better than a muscle bound thug. (Bane image courtesy of the Batman T Shirts)
One of the surprises that really caught me off guard was Bane’s voice in the movie. Somehow they made him sound suspiciously like Alfred Pennyworth with a mouth full of loose gravel and spoken through 100 yards of steel pipe. It was really, really disconcerting. Honestly the whole time I felt like his voice had been dubbed over, really robbing his dialog of any import or strength. Plus I spent about half the time trying to understand what the hell he had just said. I’d like to not say “I’m not saying the voice doesn’t work but…” but honestly, that’s exactly what I am saying (without the but).
I have seen other critics call the story and plot ludicrous and to be fair to them, it pretty much is. The story borrows but from but does not really tell the stories from Knightfall, Breaking the Bat, No Man’s Land, and a half dozen other Batman comic story lines and as a result fails to tell one complete story. It definitely feel fragmented, convoluted, and lacking in continuity. Months of movie time are covered in the space of a few minutes and very little motivation is given for any of the supporting characters to do pretty much anything. Excellent supporting characters such as Catwoman or Alfred disappear for huge swaths of time only to reappear when the plot needs them. However, I saw the Batman Marathon at the local Regal and saw this movie after watching Batman Begins and the Dark Knight and I can say that while TDK is a brilliant story with amazing character interaction Batman Begins is ludicrous with a capital L. Ra’s al Ghul’s plan, if you recall, was to spend months injecting a fear causing hallucinogenic into the water supply and then microwave it into steam to cause the city to self destruct and teach the world a lesson or something. It doesn’t get much hokier than that.
That being said, the story does seem to lack focus and drifts from story to story, even reprising Ra’s al Ghul in order to give Bane something to do. This is a mistake in my opinion. Bane was always much cooler and more interesting in the comics when he just had a personal axe to grind with Batman. If you read my (brilliant, IMO) post on why The Wrath of Khan is the best of the Star Trek movies you might see what I mean. When the bad guy’s plan is to blow up a city (or the world) Hollywood seems to think we are going to somehow be personally connected to the story and feel some kind of kinship for all the people threatened. Nothing could be further from the truth. The fact is we connect with a specific character in the movie and feel more involved when there is some kind of personal vendetta going on. This is one of the many reasons the Dark Knight was so cool. Joker wanted nothing more than to screw with Batman. The threats to the city were incidental. When I watch a movie I want to feel like I’m Batman fighting to save my life, not one of the squirming millions of unwashed masses he is trying to protect.
All that being said, this movie is definitely worth watching. It drags at places, and you will feel every one of the self indulgent 164 minutes (mostly in your numb butt and full bladder), but visually stunning and the action is pretty damned good.
I’m not going to get into the story too deep as I expect pretty much everyone reading this to watch it and don’t want to hand out any spoilers. Sufficed to say Batman has been in hiding for eight years since taking the blame for the death of Harvey Dent. Bruce Wayne has been a recluse until Catwoman pulls him back to reality by robbing his safe. There is a lot of complicated, convoluted non-action in the first 45 minutes until Bane finally takes over the city No Man’s Land style. All hell breaks loose, and Batman is more or less broken. Stuff blows up. There is a massive riot. More stuff blows up. The end.
The stars. Batman movie. Two stars. Comic book movie. One star. Catwoman was pretty damned impressive, not to mention uber hot. One star. Almost all the supporting characters delivered at least a good performance, if not great. One star. Visually stunning. Expect to see some technical Oscars for this one. Two stars. While the pretty much used canon as a doormat, they tried to keep all the characters except Bane true to themselves. One star. I thought Joseph Gordon-Levitt was a really good choice to introduce as a new character, and his role added a lot to the story. One star. The action was pretty impressive all around (not to mention brutal), especially any fight between Bane and Batman. One star. Overall entertaining as hell. Two stars. Total: twelve stars.
The black holes. Long, long movie with non-action portions that seemed to really mire the plot down. Pacing could have been tightened up a lot. One black hole. The main villain was pretty damned boring, which I am going to ascribe to breaking too far away from canon. One black hole. Bane’s voice. One black hole. The story was very much overly convoluted, with myriad sub plots that seemed to go no where. Too much source material in my opinion. One black hole. Some off putting continuity issues, and characters that disappeared for a while. One black hole. Total: five black holes.
A grand total of seven stars. Decently good, and well worth watching. I will put this one on par with Batman Returns but well below The Dark Knight. It is a good ending to the trilogy, but I honestly did not walk away with the sense of satisfaction I had hoped to have. Should you see it? Absolutely. Spend a few extra bucks on IMAX. This is a must see for any Batman fan and a should see for everyone else. Just don’t expect to be riveted to the seat by a Heath Ledger like performance. Date movie? Only in the sense that even women should see this film. There is nothing going on here that will encourage her to take off her clothes with you, and having you geek out next to her might actually hurt your chances. See it with your friends IMO. I think you will enjoy it more. Bathroom break? Pretty much anywhere in the first 45 minutes would be fine, but if you are looking for a time later in the film I would say any of the the first two climbing out of the pit attempts. You will know what I mean. Not only is Nolan joining the “excitement through repetition” crowd but that whole sub plot adds absolutely nothing to the story except for more continuity issues.
Thanks for reading, and sorry I couldn’t gush more about this film. It was good but not gush-worthy. Worth seeing for sure, but honestly I don’t think I am motivated to see in in a theater a second time. I’d actually rather go see the Avengers again. Follow me on Twitter @NerdKungFu. Feel free to post comments about this movie or review here. Any off topic comments or suggestions can go to [email protected]. Talk to you soon.
Dave
Who would win in a fight Batman versus Max Payne?
These questions Dave used to post as part of bigger review, but the fact is most of them came from arguments we would have on the whole who would win thing so I thought I would throw up my own.
This question seems pretty obvious to anyone who did not play Max Payne all the way through. Batman has taken down hundreds of gun toting thugs who look a lot like Max. However, as a fan of Max Payne I can say it wouldn’t be as clear cut as all that. Max, like Batman, is haunted by the deaths of his family. However, his deaths happened recently while he was an adult and included his child. This gives him a much more nothing to lose attitude that is almost a death wish. He, like Batman, has the ability to push through any level of pain and suffering to deliver more pain to his enemies. If you don’t believe me just replay the Baseball Bat chapter.
I do think Batman would triumph in this fight, but it wouldn’t be a easy or clean as most fights against normal civilians would be. Max has untested reserves and an unholy resourcefulness that might surprise the Bat. Plus he has bullet time.
This image I pulled from Dave’s Batman t shirt collection, another one where he has hundreds of shirts.
Jason
Batman hates the Bay Area?
So I heard that they are doing a tour with the Tumbler Batmobile and got really excited. I think the Tumbler is the best Batmobile they have ever come up with, even better than the original. However, I have discovered that they are completely ignoring the Bay Area on their 26 city tour. Here is the list in case you want to see it:
Scarlett Johansson is rumored to want to do a solo Black Widow film.
I honestly laughed out loud when I saw this. I don’t mind women superheros, but if you look back on the history of female superhero movies you can see the fields is littered with horrible movies that are kind of career killers for the stars. It’s like Scarlett is tired of being a successful actress and wants something to end her run.
If you look at girl superhero movies, the only two that are remotely canon and taken seriously are Catwoman and Electra. In both cases the films failed miserably. Catwoman was voted the 15th worst film in history, and Electra was about as unwatchable as a comic movie can get. The thing that Scarlett Johansson should keep in mind however is the fact that since those films neither Halle Berry or Jeniffer Garner have had a good solo role and have kind of slunk off to do mediocre movies and support roles.
It makes me wonder if there is something about women comic hero movies that puts the audience off. Most comic book fans are dudes, and a group more willing to look at hot women in tights you won’t find. However, it might just be that since most comic book fans like to think of themselves as the hero in a film, you won’t pull them in to watch someone the cannot see themselves as like a hot girl. Either that or Hollywood doesn’t know how to or care enough to write a decent script.
The Catwoman image I got from the comic book t shirts. Nice shirt, but I don’t know about the color.
Jason
Why is it the only two villains the Superman movies can ever come up with are Lex Luthor and General Zod?
Dave’s not much into Superman but I am, and I have to say that I was really hoping for someone other than another old villain for the next movies.
Honestly, General Zod was never much of a villain in the comic, yet somehow he is the main bad guy in two different movies. I guess this is more proof that Hollywood cannot come up with anything remotely new for anything. It’s not like there aren’t other villains who can give Superman a run for his money. 
Brainiac alone makes for a really good story because he is so smart, and if you just want life threatening mayhem go with Doomsday. I just think General Zod was so well done in the other movie that there is no need to rehash his character again.
This cool Braniac picture comes from Dave’s DC comic t shirts. I think I am going to have to get one for myself.
Of course, really when you think about it I don’t know if Lex Luthor was really treated fairly in Superman Returns. Sure, he was pretty cool and I thought Kevin Spacey both did a great job and had the man parts to actually go bald unlike Gene Hackman, but Lex Luthor is supposed to have a ton of super science backing him up. I want to see Lex in a super powered armor suit flying around blasting Superman with Krpytonite autocannon shells. Also, what the hell was the deal with his secret plan? He wanted to raise a new continent, killing half the world population, and then sell barren salt encrusted rock real estate to the half that didn’t drown? I mean sure he might do some damage, but did he really think that no country in the world wouldn’t have an aircraft carrier survive the aftermath and wouldn’t air strike him to death? Also, while appearing before the UN to claim the land he just created don’t you think someone might have asked him some tough questions about the billions of people he just killed in order to make it? Just dumb, really.
Back on Zod. The question I always had at the end of the last one was shouldn’t Lois Lane have had super powers after the whole switcheroo machine went off? For that matter, if the three of them could have killed Superman why did they take the chance on him pulling some kind of fast one? I’d be like “Well, we could let him use his equipment in his Fortress of Solitude where ever single wall and piece of furniture looks alike, or we could just remove all his internal organs and launch the remains into the nearest black hole.”
Also, what is up with a human having sex with Superman? I mean, aside from the fact that he would most likely tear her in half in the first two seconds, how is it he feels any sensation from her? It would be like having sex with a woman made out of tissue paper.
Damn, I just wrote a Dave length post. Don’t get used to it. I did find this really funny blog cast of General Zod talking to his defense attorney before being sentenced to the phantom zone. It’s really good.
Jason
Incoming Green Lantern Suckquel
I have been reading a bit about the new Green Lantern sequel. Any fan of comics will tell you that the first one sucked. While I don’t pay attention things like writers and directors like Dave does it seems they are making a few positive changes and then a massive number of negative stay the sames.
The GL shirt I found in Dave’s DC comic t shirts, incidentally.
First off, they are apparently firing the director, Martin Campbell. Good move in my opinion. He really chocked it. However, they are keeping the same writers. How does that make sense? I mean, do they really think the writers from the first one did such a great job, or that they have some kind of connection to the Green Lantern story? If this was an original character they created that might be a good idea, but really the original creators all are the comic book writers. Get any lame hack in the world he he will have as much connection.
They say they are going to be relying less on CGI. Good move. There was way to much of it in all the wrong directions. But the biggest mistake they are going to make is they are keeping smarmy sleaze bucket Ryan Reynolds as the main guy. Is it remotely possible to hire someone who might take the part seriously and not smirk at the camera all day long? Maybe someone who understands comics. He wears a mask. He doesn’t have to be the biggest hearth throb in Hollywood. Get rid of him.
Jason
Top 20 Movies of 2011
So I was doing my own awards for a while, but got sidetracked and kind of ran out of steam. Honestly, I kept coming up wit the same awards. However, something I can do easily that I should have done earlier would be a top list of the best movies from last year. Next post I will list the 10 worst films of 2011. Look for that tomorrow.
I was going to originally do a top 10, but realized there are 20 movies I would at least like to mention positively from 2011. These are not all Oscar quality. They are all also not just the top scorers in my stars/black hole rating system. In fact, they are all based on my very biased personal taste in movies. I am rating these on how much I enjoyed watching them. Also these are all just the movies I saw, so don’t bitch to me about something I missed that should be on this list.
20. Warrior–I really didn’t think I was going to enjoy this, but then actually did. Also, I’ll see anything with Nick Nolte in it.
19. Thor-I had some issues with the pacing on this film (like how does someone land on earth, do the whole fish out of water thing, convince the super hot Natalie Portman to dedicate her life to you, and save the world in about six hours of movie time) but overall it was fun and exciting, with a good lead into the Avengers.
18. The Smurfs–Again, fun movie, and a pleasant flashback to a less painful childhood memory. Also, Gargomel was awesome.
17. The Muppets-Another fun flashback. You don’t get much better than seeing Gonzo the Great wreck his own life.
16. Fast Five–For all that this is really not my kind of movies (driving movies usually bore me) this movie was a big surprise for me. The story wasn’t just added on to propel the driving and was reasonably functional. Overall a big surprise.
15. Paul–Most other reviewers excreted all over this film, but I enjoyed it. Of course, I dream of meeting an alien and hanging out with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, so I have a personal bias.
14. Real Steel–Another film that I am probably alone in loving, but I thought this film was really super fun. I could watch giant robots fighting all day and night. If only this film had shown the inevitable conclusion, when the robots rise up and destroy mankind. Also, I loved the idea of mixing futuristinc high tech with white trash culture.
13. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Pt2–I avoided Harry Potter for years, and when this movie came out did a marathon watching of all of them. I was shocked at how much I ended up enjoying the whole series. Quite good.
12. Tower Heist–Eddie Murphy doing what he should be doing, plus the great Alan Alda. Story was good, cast was good, acting was good. Overall a decent experience, and it sucks that it didn’t make a ton of money.
11. Don’t be Afraid of the Dark–Do you want a movie that actually scares you because you care about the movie? See this one. Want to see something that you think is scary because they are stacking the bodies like cord wood? Look for something stupider.
10. Captain America: the First Avenger–This is how movies should treat comic books. I love the fact that they kept everything in WWII, like it should have been. Also, Hugo Weaving was amazing as the Red Skull (Red Skull image courtesy of the Comic Book T Shirts).
9. The Thing–I normally despise prequels, so you know it must be good if I am going to put it on my top movie list. If you ever saw the first one, see this one immediately. If you haven’t, see this one immediately and then see that one. You will not be wasting your time at all.
8. X-Men First Class–I thought this was the best comic book movie of the year, and easily one of the best origin movies so far. I did a whole diatribe about why most origin movies suck, and this one manages to avoid all the mistakes.
7. True Grit–Great remake of a great movie based on a great book.
6. Troll Hunter–This film sounds like a recipe for everything I hate in film: documentary, found footage, and subtitled. Yet somehow it is really amazing. The Norwegians can do it right.
5. The Descendants–Not my normal cup of tea (and I hate tea) but really good.
4. Rise of the Planet of the Apes–I have watched this movie about six times since I got it on DVD, and saw it three times in theaters. Love this film.
3. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo–Once I got past the whole horrific rape scene this movie turned into an amazing film. I am really looking forward to the next one.
2. The Artist–I know I just saw this last week, but I should have seen it in 2011. Really an amazing film.
1. Moneyball–I was really torn on this. I almost gave it to the Artist, but honestly you can’t really compare the two. I really enjoyed this film, although a big part of it might be from living in Oakland.
That’s it. Look for my worst movies of 2011 tomorrow. Follow me on Twitter @NerdKungFu or email me at [email protected]. Feel free to comment with your agreement or disagreement here as well. Talk to you soon.
Dave
The 10 Scariest Clowns of All Time
So last week Jason was giving me crap for being scared of clowns when he was talking about the new Twisted Metal movie. Personally I don’t really see this as a weird phobia or mental condition at all. For any rational, thinking person clowns are freaking evil! Although not as evil as their horrible cousins, mimes, they cause mayhem and despair wherever their tiny little cars and giant shoes go (by the way, if you happen to agree with me join the I Hate Clowns movement).
Fear of clowns is scientifically called coulrophobia, but I call it having a brain and survival instinct. I thought I would try to prove my point to Jason and all the other people who think I am weird for this and list my 10 Scariest Clowns of All Time.
10. Ronald McDonald-I think the first time I realized how evil clowns were was when I was a kid and visited a McDonald’s. Out front they had a park bench with a statue of Ronald with his arm out so you could sit down and take a picture like a moron or something. My friend sat there and all of a sudden I got the creepiest feeling ever. In looking back as an adult I realized that the pose and look was straight up child molester. However, if you want to count the evilness of clowns based on how much damage and despair they have brought upon the world, from a dietary point of view Ronald McDonald is the Hitler of clowns. How much garbage has he helped shovel into the waiting maws of future obese diabetics?
9. Violator from Spawn. The fat clown that turns into a horrid demon was bad enough in the movie, but trust me when I say he was way worse in the comic book.
8. the Joker-I am of course a Batman fan and the Joker is my second favorite villain (Two Face is my first). However, part of the reason he is such a good villain is he is horrible! I don’t care which one; Jack Nicholson, the cartoon, the comic, Heath Ledger, even Cesar Romero from the TV show. They are all scary as hell. (Joker image courtesy of the Batman T-Shirt category)
7. the clown doll from Poltergeist-ugh. Thank god I never saw this movie as a kid. I never would have slept again. This clown was scary as hell, kept showing up in unexpected places, and never spoke. Plus, it was a clown.
6. Sergio from the Last Circus-I don’t think any of you saw this Spanish film, but if you do and don’t suffer from coulrophobia, you will. In my mind clowns are scary sociopaths anyway, and to see one that actually is a sociopath is god awful.
5. the zombie clown from Zombieland-this is a nice convergence for my best friend and I. You see, I fear clowns and he fears zombies. Works out nicely. I think part of the reason I loved this movie is the main character shows the rational sense to have a healthy fear of the “c” word.
4. Captain Spaulding from the Devil’s Rejects and House of 1,000 Corpses-Rob Zombie learned early on how well clowns work in horror films with Halloween and put that experience to good use when he created this character. Talk about messed up.
3. the clowns from Killer Klowns from Outer Space-not only are they clowns, but they are from outer space, have huge freaking clown heads, and are here to capture humans in order to encase them in cotton candy and drink their fluids with a crazy straw! I saw this movie at a friends house and I think my hand print is still impressed on the armrest of his couch.
2. Sweet Tooth from Twisted Metal-yes, Jason used to make me play this game and always force me to watch the intro showing how Sweet Tooth came to be. Can you imagine anything scarier than a clown with glowing red eyes and flames for hair driving an ice cream truck armed with enough guns to sink a battleship? Well, actually I can since Sweet Tooth is only number 2 on my list.
1. Pennywise from Stephen King’s It-no, not the band. Only the scariest clown in the history of the universe, who spends his times killing children and not with laughter. Seeing this guy on screen might have been what pushed me over the top from being kind of creeped out by clowns to full blown terror.
Sorry, but Patch Adams didn’t quite make the list, although it was close. That’s pretty much it. I think I am going to see an indy film tonight, so look for a good review tomorrow. I need to go have a couple drinks and punch Jason in the head for making me relive all this. Post comments here or follow me on Twitter @NerdKungFu. You can also email me at [email protected]. Thanks for reading. Talk to you soon.
Dave
Safe House Movie Review
Decent, in a standard way.
I am a Denzel Washington fan, and something I learned while watching his best (in my opinion) movie Training Day is he is way more entertaining as a bad guy than a good guy which is why Safe House works for me. However, I think one of the main reasons I like Denzel Washington is he actually has a really good eye for scripts and manages to stay away from obvious dogs. His discriminating tastes is the main reason I will see anything he opts to work on.
That being said, the script for Safe House is on the far end of the good script spectrum for Denzel, almost bordering on the mediocre. Honestly, if this movie hadn’t had Mr. Washington’s precise delivery and perfect acting ability the flaws in the script would have risen up like scum on the surface of a stagnant pond and filled the theater with the odor of decaying organic matter. The story latches onto every spy movie cliche like a remora eel and the events connecting the assorted action sequences are tenuous at best, with plot devices so far removed from what would actually make sense that it sometimes feels like you are watching them through a telescope in another solar system.
As for Ryan Reynolds and his performance, I am torn. On the one hand, in his last few efforts (Green Lantern in particular. Green Lantern shirt image courtesy of the Comic Book T-Shirt category) I have railed against him constantly playing Van Wilder over and over again; the sleezy pretty party boy who can’t help but smarm and sleep with anything remotely attractive in the movie and to be fair in this film he manages to avoid that role completely. He is a serious and career minded CIA operative with a girlfriend he loves deeply. On the other hand, he seems to alternate between looking completely helpless and being a young James Bond. I can’t even say this was the result of a decent character arc, with him being inexperienced at the beginning and developing into a hard case by the end. Instead the movie changes gears back and forth without warning, with his character either hiding in a dark corner (literally) or ruthlessly gunning down whatever gets in his way.
The story is of young Matt Weston (Ryan Reynolds-Green Lantern, the Change Up, Buried), a CIA operative who is basically a hotel keeper at a secret safe house in Cape Town. Tobin Frost (Denzel Washington-Training Day, Man on Fire, Inside Man) is a traitor and super spy who gets himself captured. He is placed in Matt’s safe house where a team of Aryan Army looking CIA guys are going to water board and torture him for whatever he was doing in Cape Town (selling some top secret information, but honestly the actual reasons for most of the movie seem pretty inconsequential). While they are in the process another team of guys attacks and kills pretty much everyone. Watson takes Tobin out at gunpoint and the long, long chase begins. He is being pursued by some bad guys while being ordered by his superiors to do different dumb stuff. Tobin is a master of human manipulation and works on getting into Matt’s head.
Honestly, I can’t get much more into the story without more or less giving it all away. Spy hijinks ensues. Stuff blows up. Guys get shot. There are about as many cliches as bullets fired, including the ending.
The stars. Denzel Washington. Two stars. Denzel Washington playing a villain rather than a hero. One star. The action was all pretty good and exciting, if a little repetitive. One star. The romance subplot, which normally would I find distracting and worthless, actually added a lot to the story. It gave Tobin a real tool to get into Matt’s head and screw with him, which added a lot to the story. One star. The interaction between Tobin and Matt was really well done, and pulled you into the story in many ways that the plot did not. Two stars. Generally entertaining. Two stars. Total: nine stars.
The black holes. Weak script. Two black holes. Inconsistent tone from Ryan Reynold’s character. One black hole. Spy story cliches we have all seen in about fifty movies, including the ending. One black hole. Some pretty gaping plot holes. One black hole. Total: five black holes.
A grand total of four stars. Not bad, but to be honest not what I expect from a movie Denzel Washington chooses to star in. Also, if anyone else had been cast in his role the movie probably would have swung into the black hole zone. Worth seeing? Sure, if you don’t want to follow the plot too closely. The action is the best part after Denzel’s performance, so it might be worth seeing on a big screen. Date movie? Meh. Maybe, if she is into this sort of thing, or Denzel Washington (or, for that matter, Ryan Reynolds). On the other hand odds are you will suffer in comparison to either of those two guys, so consider it carefully.
Thanks for reading. More movies coming out this weekend. I will probably see the Vow, about as chick flick as a movie can get. If I am feeling the need to expel mass quantities of bile I might see Mysterious Island 2 but I can already tell how that is going to suck. I am torn regarding seeing The Phantom Menace 3D. On the one hand I don’t want to give even a dime to support such mediocre movie making or George Lucas. On the other hand, since I did not have this blog going when I first saw it I might enjoy doing the review. I think what I might do is buy a ticket for a movie that I like (Chronicle, for example) and then just sneak in to the other theater. I have some 3D glasses lying around here somewhere. Follow me on Twitter @Nerdkungfu. I’ve noticed I don’t get a ton of comments for specific requests or blog ideas so if you would like to contact me without posting simply email me feel free to do so at [email protected]. Talk to you soon.
Dave
Chronicle Movie Review
Pretty much the senior year in High School I always dreamed of.
How does this sound familiar? A introverted high school geek is abused by his alcoholic father and all of his so-called peers. Ignored by girls, pushed around by bullies, and spending each day in an alienating Skinner box of loneliness. Then, through some set of mysterious (and blatantly unexplained) phenomenon he gains super powers and uses them to wreck most of his town and punish all who had ever wronged him. To be honest, I really didn’t have to see Chronicle as I wrote the script for it pretty much every day in my head throughout high school and for a bunch of years after that.
First off, this movie is pretty freaking amazing. Found footage is a little overplayed these days, but in this case it is used to present some pretty amazing concepts and really good characters, each with their own personality and priorities. Plus it is about kids with super powers. Additionally I was really impressed with the acting and performances of the three kids, and the found footage aspect of the movie felt incredibly organic and real.
It’s usually at this point in one of my reviews where I say something like “That’s not to say the movie doesn’t have it’s faults, which we will go into detail shortly”. However, as I sit here reflecting on my cinema experience I honestly can’t think of anything that bugged me about this film. I’ll try to think about something before I get to the black holes, but overall I think this was an excellent movie.
The story is of Andrew (Dane DeHaan-In Treatment, True Blood, the Front), an introverted geek treated with abuse and contempt and disregard by pretty much everyone around him except for his cousin Matt (Alex Russell-Almost Kings, the Best Man, Wasted on the Young). He buys an old camera to document his life but it is also implied he is using it as a defense against his abusive father (Micheal Kelly-Adjustment Bureau, Dawn of the Dead, Unbreakable) and the people around him, as well as film the last days of his dying mother (Bo Peterson-the Wooden Camera, Endgame, the Bone Snatcher). Matt drags him to a rave in a barn somewhere. After a few minutes of him looking and acting painfully out of place (lots of deja vu there for me as well) he gets dragged out of the parking lot by the most popular kid in school, Steve (Micheal B. Jordan-Friday Night Lights, House M.D., Red Tails) who wants him to use his camera to film something weird in a field. It is a tunnel leading down. Matt, Steve, and Andrew all descend, where they see a big glowing thing that gives them all telekinetic ability.
At this point the film turns into a documentary of the three boys as they develop and strengthen their abilities, as well as their friendships. They run around doing what teenage boys would given God-like powers: play pranks on people and laughing their asses off. As things develop they gain more and more powers, including flight and invulnerability. Meanwhile, Andrews friendship with Steve helps him gain popularity, at least until he gets drunk at a party and embarrasses himself in front of a girl, who blabs it all over the school proving once again that women are evil (oops did I type that part out loud?).
Anyway, things take place that many people may interpret as a dark turn but which I saw the inevitable conclusion of an abused geek gaining powers, showing once again that geeks are to be feared and respected, not abused. Paybacks are a bitch, and he starts dealing it wholesale. He also is motivated to find money to help his sick mother. I don’t want to get too much into the rest of the story. Nothing will really surprise you too much, but I found it enjoyable nevertheless.
The stars. Really well done found footage movie. Two stars. The character development was really strong for all three guys, and the interaction between the three felt very real and believable. Two stars. Good acting from the three main guys. One star. While the film was found footage, the directors managed to find really clever ways of making it not suffer from the usual gremlins of found footage films: Captain Shaky-motion-sickness-inducement and his sidekick Corp. There’s-always-one-main-character-missing-from-the-scene. I thought the use and placement of the cameras really clever and well done. One star. For being low budget the special effects were pretty cool. One star. Dialog was good and real also. One star. Overall a lot of fun. Two stars. Total: ten stars.
The black holes. I think I did come up with a couple, but the really cool thing about the way this film was filmed was there doesn’t really feel like you need any of the missing information explained to you. For that matter, the missing information and unexplored sub plots actually adds to the story in this format. I will say that while the movie was good I think it would have been better if they had gone for the R rating. The PG-13 choices they were forced to make left a lot of the scenes feeling a little flat. One black hole. I will also say I was hoping Andrew would do more to his miserable class mates. That is really just me, but there it is. One black hole. Total: two black holes.
So a grand total of eight stars, and the best movie I have seen so far this year. I thought this was really good, and odds are you will enjoy the heck out of it. It is more of a superhero film than anything else 
(and about 1,000 times more entertaining than big budget bomb Green Lantern. GL image courtesy of the Comic Book T-Shirt category) so treat it as such when trying to decide to bring a date to this. If she is looking forward to seeing The Avengers then she might enjoy this. If not she will be bored and in that case see it with your other nerd friends.
Thanks everyone for reading. These blogs are getting to be more and more fun to do, and I am now using my daily stats as a measure of my worth as a human being. Follow me on Twitter @NerdKungFu. Thanks again, and talk to you soon.
Dave
