15 Fictional Characters I wish were real life friends of mine: 11 of 15
5. Scotty from Star Trek
I know what you are thinking. I am such a fan boy why would I not choose Kirk or Spock? Well, to be honest Spock is not exactly a barrel of laughs to hang out with and Kirk would score with every chick in the place human or otherwise leaving you walking morosely home alone. Also he seems to be kind of a mean drunk. Scotty, on the other hand, is a party even when he’s not drinking and when he has a few watch out! In short order we could be singing Irish ballads, making inept pick up attempts at hot green girls, and getting into barroom brawls with Klingons. Also never forget that at one point he was almost convicted of being a serial killer and if that isn’t the coolest story to tell chicks at a bar I don’t know what is.
Why would Scotty want to be my friend? Well, I am part Irish and have a deep appreciation of his accent. I’m not much of a drinker myself and would therefore give him the lions share of the Romulan ale. 
Plus while I don’t get drunk a lot I always have a lot of fun watching drunk people stumble along and fall on their face (Alcohol image comes from the funny t shirt category). In my defense I am also really good about making sure my drunk friends get home safe, so Scotty would definitely be in his bunk in one piece.
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15 Fictional Characters I wish were real life friends of mine: 12 of 15
4. Daryl Dixon from the Walking Dead
I’ll let you in on a little secret. I am a fan of white trash culture. Well, maybe not the music but I have any number of relatives who live in trailer parks and have eaten squirrel. It’s not something I broadcast but I do get along with all kinds of people if you know what I mean. I think Daryl would be very cool to hang out with, zombie apocalypse or no. He’s just got that good ole boy vibe that I dig. You can sum up why he is cool in one word: crossbow. He’s also tough as hell, something I truly respect.
Why would Daryl want to be my friend? Well, if this were a zombie apocalypse (fingers crossed) anyone with a pulse who is not trying to steal all your guns would be cool. If I were on the show I think I would be the guy who always sleeps in the car in case of a quick getaway and I would definitely stop for Daryl, Glenn, Maggie, Michonne, and Rick (sorry Carl. I hope there’s room in the next car. The rest of you post Gov adds can hoof it too).
Daryl image courtesy of the Walking Dead t shirt category.
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15 Fictional Characters I wish were real life friends of mine: 13 of 15
3. Jayne Cobb from Firefly
Does this one even need an explanation? What thinking nerd doesn’t want to be friends with Jayne? His is super cool, super fun, a hero in a town that produces mud, and has excellent taste in headgear. He says some of the best lines ever (“Pain is scary”) and has a very direct approach to problem solving that I wish more of my actual friends would adapt. Plus he is a family man and cares for his mother and sister. You can’t help but respect that.
Why would Jayne want to be my friend? Good question. He is not exactly the friendly type. I have the feeling earning Jayne’s friendship is a lot of work and can be dropped for the right amount of money. He is a mercenary through and through and I wouldn’t count on him doing anything for friendship. I think the best I could hope for would be a friendly acquaintance. In truth I would be happy with that.
This image is from one of my all time favorite Firefly tshirts. I think it is awesome and says everything you ever needed to know about Jayne.
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15 Fictional Characters I wish were real life friends of mine: 14 of 15
2. Bruce Wayne
Not Batman, but rather the billionaire party boy that hangs out with super models week long. What part of that doesn’t sound awesome? I wish I had some really, really rich friends. I have several who are well off but if I had one friend who had the capability of owning his own island that would be pretty cool. Of course, the fact that he’s secretly Batman means I would always be safe(er) with him around. Plus it would be hilarious if I showed up at a party at stately Wayne Manor wearing this Batman hoodie.
Why would Bruce Wayne want to be my friend? Well, when it comes to sucking up to rich people I think would have a talent. Also I’m always very respectful to help and I think I would get along really well with Alfred. Plus if Bruce were getting super tired from partying all the time and then fighting crime all night long and needed someone to take care of all the super models and ballerinas I think I could take some of that burden on for him. I’m just that much of a giver.
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15 Fictional Characters I wish were real life friends of mine: 15 of 15
1. Jack Burton from Big Trouble in Little China
Of all the guys on this list Jack Burton is the guy I most want to party with. He’s loud and boisterous but a lot of fun. Plus he gets drunk and makes outrageous bets that he loses so I could totally take his money. He has a super cool truck and most women find him incredibly annoying so you know you could pick up the aftermath in his wake. He tends to end up at oddball places and things and if you hang around long enough you might see spirits and magic.
Why would Jack Burton want to be my friend? First off I love doing weird bets so we could totally gamble on whether you can cut a bottle in half with a sword or not. I like truckers and big trucks. I like to think that we would just get along great.
Pork Chop Express image courtesy of the novelty t shirt category.
That’s my list. I’m sure there are a few I forgot so feel free to post comments or email me on it. Also if any of you happen to know that these fictional characters were based on real people and know where I can find them email me immediately. Thanks for reading. Talk to you soon.
the Infamous Dave Inman @nerdkungfu
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