Nerd Dating: Dating on a budget pt 5

Before I get into the dating advice, I would like to mention that as of tomorrow morning I will be at the big Creation Entertainment triple show this weekend.  The three shows are a Farscape convention, Stargate SG1 convention, and a Buffy/Firefly/Dollhouse convention all at the same time in the same hotel.  As I am a rabid fan of all these shows (Firefly especially.  Jayne Cobb image courtesy of the television show t shirt category)  and also sell products from all these shows on my retail site, it is not only appropriate but pretty much required that I be there.  If you are a reader of this blog and are near LAX this weekend be sure to stop by and say hi.  I love getting in person feedback, and you may inspire a whole new post direction (especially if you are a single, intelligent, nerdish brunette girl between the ages of 29-39 with elfin features, if you know what I mean).

Anyway, let’s talk more about cheap dating.  We’ve discussed how to avoid expensive stuff, how to eat, and how to not discuss your current financial situation, but we have yet to go into what to actually do while on your date.  Here is the first of some great, cheap ideas.

I am giving you the best idea first, if only because it is a great date whether you have dough or not: hiking.  Women love, love, love hiking.  It is outdoors, typically with beautiful scenery, moderately physical without the danger of making you look like an out of shape couch potato, and costs little more than the gas to get to the trail and a decent pair of shoes.  It is romantic, solitary, and a great time to talk to and get to know your date.

However, like everything else I present to you, it is not quite as simple as that.  There are some thinks you need to do.  Like we used to say in the Boy Scouts, Be Prepared (or as my friends from the Marine Corps more accurately put it, Proper Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance.  Words that I live by).  The first thing you need to do is some basic research in finding a trail that is scenic yet not terribly taxing.  There are any number of site out there to help you with this.  I think Trails.com is pretty good, but look around.  Things to consider are:

1.  Trail length-pick a distance you are reasonably certain you can make.  If you pass out from exhaustion 2 miles into the hike you will not really score any points with her.  Also, odds are very good you will be passed out in the wilderness 2 or more miles from civilization with little to no cell phone coverage.  If she has to get help for you or carry your sorry ass back you will never hear from her again.

2.  Water-will it be present or will you have to hump a ton of it in?  You should always bring water with you anyway but find out it it will be your little steel refillable water bottle or a freaking Sparklets jug.

3.  Trail difficulty-some trails are like pleasant walks in the park (literally) while others can be like crossing the Alps without a Sherpa.  Make sure there are no unpleasant surprises such as cliffs to climb up and down, log and rope bridges to fall off of, and inclines that seem like climbing up a fire escape for a million miles.  Also be aware if there are any creeks or other water obstacles you need to cross on foot.  Nothing worst than soaking wet sneakers and socks for the last 5 miles of your hike.  Also note that just because the map says there is a creek or something there does not mean drinking water.  Very little natural water is safe to drink.  This should be obvious to most adults, but then I remember who I was speaking to for the most part and figured I had better be explicit.

4.  Wildlife-squirrels, beavers, birds, badgers, raccoons, deer, and elk is a great thing to see while hiking.  On the other hand, rattlesnakes, grizzly bears, bobcats, wolves, and mountain lions are incredibly bad to see, and by some mysterious coincidence both sets of animals seems to like to hang out in the same areas.  If I have a single goal in life (besides conquest of the planet) it is to never end up as food for something at the end of my life.  Also, while I would more or less not hesitate to leave any of my male friends behind as a distraction for whatever horrific denizen of the wild was currently mauling them, like most males if I had a woman with me my natural hormone levels and social training would overtake my common sense and survival instinct, leaving me wrestling with a grizzly while the girl I was probably just a few hours away from getting rejected by escaped to safety.  Not that I’m bitter.  (Incidentally, it has been my experience that, like there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no feminists when it comes to determining who gets to go Greco-Roman with a cougar and who gets to run to find more help).  With these thoughts in mind, keep local wildlife at the forefront when picking your hiking path.  Be aware, there is no wilderness area on this planet that doesn’t have something both capably and eager to kill you.

5.  Check what hunting season it is, and wear something brightly colored (red, preferably).  You don’t want to get killed by some hillbilly redneck for the sin of wearing a brown coat during deer season.  Although it seems like most of them are drunk off their ass anyway, so if something vaguely human sized is in season maybe you need to look for an area where hunting is not permitted.

6.  Finally, be sure to check the weather and dress/prepare accordingly.  While the idea of a hike through a light summer shower might sound romantic, it is pretty common for those light summer showers to turn into torrential downpours pretty easily and make your trip miserable.  If the heat will be higher than high 80’s bring extra water and/or just reschedule.  Also, always bring sun block, sun glasses, and a hat of some kind.  Don’t look like this is your first time off pavement, whether it is or not.

That’s pretty much it.  Other than all the prep work and worry about something trying to kill you hiking is a great activity and makes for a wonderful date, followed up by that all important cheap ethnic meal later that night.

More activities next post.


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