Nerd Movie Review: Skyline
Ok, for all the fans of my dating advice, I have some good news. I am leading up to some great stuff, including the dreaded “When and how to make ‘the move'” post. Before that I am going to do some psycho girl detection advice that should be hilarious. Before that, I want to do this movie review, and might start posting my Danny Nero interview after the psycho girl detector stuff, but want to keep the variety going.
By the way, in my reviews I try to not spoil anything, but if you are really good at inference you might gain some insights into the story from this. Spare me any hate spam.
Let’s talk about Skyline. It should come as no surprise to anyone that I am a huge science fiction fan, and anything that smacks of alien invasion will at least gain my attention. And the fact of the matter is I really enjoyed this movie. There isn’t an original bone it it’s body, but like “mash ups” that are so popular these days in music (sometime I weep for America) the sum of it’s contributing parts actually melds into a movie that exceeds the value of it’s individual parts.
The movie is a mix of Alien, the Day After, Independence Day, Mars Attacks, Cloverfield, the Road, and Dawn of the Dead. (Alien image courtesy of the movie t shirt category) It starts off with way too much character development in the form of a Brooklyn couple coming to LA for a huge Hollywood party with their overly successful buddy. I started off hating the main character for being a kind of sleazy pretty boy with a way too hot girlfriend, and most of the other characters didn’t really appeal to me much either. Is it so much to ask for at least one token nerd in a science fiction movie?
Anyway, after a long night of debauchery blue lights show up and start Hoovering people into the sky. Giant alien ships show up and more or less kick the crap out of everything the humans throw at them.
The one major issue I have with the story is, if in the case of alien invasion (or zombies, werewolves, vampires, chainsaw wielding maniacs, or killer bunny rabbits) where there is no place appears even remotely safer than where you are currently, then barricade the doors and freaking stay put. This is doubly true if you are stuck with a couple of really hot women. Is it that hard to think of something to do? In the movie it seems pretty obvious that just showing your nose outside the door is a fast track to the super vacuum cleaner in the sky, yet they seem to try to find reasons to run outside every 30 seconds. For god’s sake, hang out and drink your toilet water until the aliens get bored and bail out.
On the positive side, the aliens and ships look freaking awesome, and the F/X amazingly lifelike. I could have spent two hours watching the aliens run around wrecking Los Angeles (something I kept hoping would happen while I was stuck there for two weeks last month) and been happy. As it is, you pretty much get only 45 minutes of that. The aliens are scary as hell, and makes you never want to see a blue light again in your life. The main character, who I disliked at the start of the movie, got to be pretty cool towards the end and I am happy to report that the classic story of the guy sacrificing himself for the girl is reversed in this film.
The other thing I loved is, while the movie was derivative of other films in the same way a photocopy is slightly derivative of the original document, they managed to stay away from the horrible cliche Hollywood ending that the movie felt like it was leading up to. I found that really refreshing in the same way that Independence Day felt like a massive waste of two hours of my life (a computer virus? Really? They can’t even get PC viruses to work on Apples. Give me a freaking break). I’m not going to spoil anything by giving any more details than that.
Overall, I enjoyed it and would have to recommend it. I am trying to figure out a rating system that is nerd related, like pocket protectors or something. I think I like the 10 point systems rather than 5 point, so if any of you have a suggestion let me know. I have an idea that is star related but I need to think about it some more. Odds are it will be painfully complicated, but I have to assume anyone reading this has half a brain or more and can understand something slightly more convoluted than a Lego assembly instruction book. However, until I figure it out (any suggestions would be very seriously considered, so by all means chime in) I will just say I give this one a 6.5 out of 10.
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Gina November 18, 2010 at 12:08 am
The best rating systems offer some sort of analogy. For example, if this were a food blog you could make an analogy between the movie experience and a lunch experience: five stars is your boss buying you sushi and a cocktail, and one star is your dog puking under your desk at noon. I suggest that you find an analogy related not only to nerdery but to t-shirts as well. A two, for example, could be pocket protector fail: ink stain on t-shirt.
Okay, it needs to be less clumsy and more succinct. Work on that.
Dave November 18, 2010 at 10:31 am
Good thought. I have an idea of an analogy. I’ll work it up and unveil it when I get my review for the Expendables done.