Nerd Dating: Spotting crazy girls early pt 5
OK, I’ve reached the point in this series that it might have been easier to just list the ways you can spot non-crazy girls (I hesitate to use the word “sane” in this circumstances) but it seems you have a better chance of winning the lottery than finding that extremely rare creature. What this really is is how to spot girls crazy enough to severely complicate your life and/or cause you physical harm. The ones who will only cause you emotional pain I consider entirely datable. All things in life are relative. Here are a few more spotting tips.
16. Excessive tattoos and piercings. Personally I actually find it really these really attractive, but that is my own cross to bear. I also had a thing for my own piercings back in the day, but I think when I first started this whole dating advice blog I mentioned that I personally make a lousy boyfriend, so take that for what you will. Women (and men) who feel the need for multiple visible piercings and tattoos tend to have all kinds of “Pay attention to me” issues. I kind of see 
them as showing different symptoms of the same mental issues that strippers suffer from.
(Pinhead says “Pay attention to me as we tear your soul apart”. Image courtesy of the horror movie t shirt category)
17. Excessive cosmetic surgery, makeup, and elaborate hair styles. Another train wreck. Women who go for this sort of thing have massive self esteem issues. Again, you have to look for the excessive. A girl who has a mole removed or a bad scar worked on is not excessive. Nose, lips, and eyelids really is. A girl who gets a breast enhancement to make her body more proportional I don’t consider excessive. A girl who gets a breast enhancement so big that comparisons to sporting utensils bigger than a billiards ball become functional is excessive (think _____ball-sized). A perm is not excessive. A blowout that takes an hour or more every morning is. Also, watch out for women with excessively trimmed eyebrows. If it looks like her eyebrows were drawn on with a pencil stay away. This goes triple for girls who have their eyebrows plucked out and replaced by tattoos in their place.
18. Does she talk about her private grooming practices early on? Girls who feel the need to tell you exactly when and what kind of bikini wax she got are fishing around to see if they can get a reaction from you in order to better mess with your mind. There is also a very good chance she feels you aren’t paying enough attention to her, and there is an extremely good chance that you can never in your life pay enough attention to her.
I gotta run. Something just came up. More tomorrow.
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