Nerd Movie Reviews

Movie Review: Rubber

Last night at movie night my friend showed us a copy of Rubber, a new movie coming out next week.  I’m not sure how he got it (and am happy that way) but reviewing a movie a week before it hits theaters makes me feel like a fully grown up movie reviewer instead of some guy who goes to the movies and then blogs about it.  I am so proud.

That being said, Rubber is not Paul.  I am pretty sure it will have a limited theater release and then go to video so fast it could possible turn time backwards.  That being said, this movie is 100% guaranteed to become a cult classic, so if you want to gain any kind of hipster nerd cred you had better see it in the theater so five years from now when your friends are talking about it you can smugly say something like “Rubber?  I saw it in the theater.  Surreal.” and watch as all their egos all deflate and burn like the Hindenburg.  I am sure at some point you will be able to leverage this into some kind of massive nerd-fu boost.

The film looks like it was created to try to impress the people at Cannes, where it was more or less universally panned.  I honestly can’t decide if it was good or bad.  The best word for it is really surreal.  It’s a melding of Repo Man, the Red Balloon, City of Lost Children, Friday the 13th, Six String Samurai, and Eraserhead.  That being said, it is shockingly well produced.  They obviously had a budget, which really makes me wish I could have sat in the pitch meeting when the producer convinced someone to fund it.

Believe it or not, this movie was written and directed by Quentin.  Not Tarantino.  Quentin Dupieux.  I wouldn’t have imagined there were two dudes named Quentin in the world, much less in the movie industry.  This makes me really wonder if Mr. Dupieux was named Quentin originally.  I don’t usually do this for movies that I review, but this movie is so weird I think I need to link the movie site to help you understand.  Here you go: Rubber the Movie.

Surreal really doesn’t cover the story.  It depicts the adventures of Robert, a tire that comes to life and has the telekinetic ability to blow people’s heads up.  He rolls around (literally) some American backwater killing people, and being enchanted by a super hot brunette French girl named Roxane Mesquida, who shows some skin in a completely unnecessary shower scene that I appreciated immensely.  There is some weird sub plot involving a group of spectators who are issued binoculars and watch Robert’s tribes and tribulations from a nearby hill and somehow are critical to the story.  There is an insane sheriff, a kid who puts bird guts on his dads(?) pizza, some guy who directs the spectators, and another guy in a wheelchair who somehow completely confounds the evil plot that is being facilitated by the insane sheriff. The film is a French production but except for Roxane the cast and set is 100% American.

Sorry if that description seemed a little vague, but I am still not sure what the hell was going on.  I am reasonably intelligent and an active movie viewer but still had a lot of trouble following it.  That being said, I still enjoyed it.  It was like eating celery: tasteless, but still fun to eat for the texture and will help clear out your intestines with all that fiber but at the end you discover you have burned more calories chewing than you gained in nutrition.

First the stars.  Surrealism.  Two stars.  The film work was in its own way brilliant.  Most of the camera work was done at the level of the tire.  We had a debate at the end whether they were using stop motion, CGI, or some kind of really good wire work and really couldn’t decide.  One star.  For a script that looked like it was written by a Sophomore in a really artsy film school the production values, including camera, editing, and sound, were all very good.  One star.  The acting was also shockingly good.  One star.  They somehow managed to make the tire feel like it was more alive and had more emotion than Nicholas Cage in his last two movies.  You honestly could tell when it was pissed and it could deliver a really ominous feel most of the time.  One star.  The special effects, mostly in the form of heads exploding, was really good.  One star.  Total: seven stars.

Now the black  holes.  Surrealism.  One black hole.  I know it’s a surrealist film, but there were a lot of moments when I was extraordinarily confused, especially by a lot of the motivations.  One black hole.  Given that this is a surrealist French film about Americans I am pretty sure there is some kind of inside French joke about America that would piss me off if I knew about it.  One black hole on speculation.   At the end of the movie I really wasn’t sure if I enjoyed it or not.  One black hole.  Total: four black holes.

Net total: three stars. Not bad, not great.  However, don’t forget the pop culture credibility you will gain from having seen it in the theater.  Also, if you are dating a girl and you somehow feel she doesn’t think you are weird enough, take her to see this.  It could be a good girl nerd coolness test.

Yesterday’s question, LexCorp versus Umbrella Corporation, is really interesting.  I think that with Lex Luthor at the head I think LexCorp could probably beat a bunch of zombies.  However, the faceless heads of Umbrella match him act for act when it comes to cold blooded.  I think in the end it would be LexCorp, but it would be close.  (Umbrella Corporation image courtesy of the Resident Evil t shirts category)

Continuing on that same thread, who would win: Umbrella Corporation verses Omni Consumer Products (Robocop)?

Tags: Movie Review Rubber, Resident Evil t shirts