Big Miracle Movie Review
A whale of a tale.
Sorry, I couldn’t resist. I’ll flagellate myself later in punishment. This movie was something of a miracle, in that I actually enjoyed it in spite of every expectation that I was going to be bored to tears. I found it an intriguing story, with cool characters who develop, lovable sea mammals, and a good example of what teamwork can accomplish. Be warned, however. If you have ever failed to separate your recycling, stepped on a bug, or accidentally fired a harpoon gun into a migrating blue whale the guilt you feel by the end of this film will be overwhelming.
Of course, like anything I watch these days there were nits I could pick, and I will get into those shortly. Nothing deal breaking, however.
The story is, of course, the three grey whales who were trapped in the ice in the late 80’s. I vaguely remember this story (I was busy dropping out of college and finding the most miserable job in the history of employment at the time) and looked it up. The movie stuck fairly close to the original, with a few major changes. 
Basically it starts off with small market reporter Adam Carlson (John Krasinski-the Office, It’s Complicated, Away We Go. Dunder Mifflin image courtesy of the TV Show T Shirts) doing some human interest stories in Barrow, Alaska, the northernmost town in the US. He comes across three whales trapped in the ice and does a story on it. It gets picked up by the national news, which catches the world’s attention. Adams ex-girlfriend, Greenpeace leader, and major pain in the ass Rachel Kramer (Drew Barrymore-E.T. the Extraterrestrial, Fever Pitch, Donnie Darko) finds out and starts campaigning to save the whales. The local Inuit tribe wants to harvest them for meat, but head whaling captain Malik (John Pingayak-no other credits) decides with all the press around his tribe would be seen in a very negative light.
At that point the serious rescue efforts get going. Oil kingpin J.W. McGraw (Ted Danson, looking kind of sharp with white hair I must say-Cheers, Becker (a show that never got the credit it deserved. I thought it was great), Saving Private Ryan) volunteers his ice breaking hover barge as a publicity stunt but later seems to really care. Rachel extorts Alaskan Governor Haskell (Stephen Root-News Radio, No Country for Old Men, King of the Hill) into mobilizing the National guard and sending two big helicopters to pull the barge. Meanwhile the locals are keeping the ice hole open for the whale. As temperatures drop two of the Three Stooges show up from Minnesota complete with Fargo accents to deploy a device they invented to help keep ice holes clear (yes I am enjoying these jokes). A self described blond Barbi (Kristen Bell-When in Rome, Forgetting Sarah Marshal, Veronica Mars) shows up from LA to freeze her ass off and broadcast the news. The National Guard pilot, Col. Scott Boyer (Dermot Mulroney-About Schmidt, Zodiac, My Best Friends Wedding) deals with the difficulties of operating in the Alaskan weather while dealing with White House Press Secretary Kelly Meyers (Vinessa(?) Shaw-3:10 to Yuma, the Hills Have Eyes, Eyes Wide Shut).
Anyway, things go grim for a while as the whole town comes out to help cut hundreds of ice holes (haw!) to the open sea. The President is forced to ask the Russians to help with one if their ice breakers. Ice gets cut. Whales breach. You see a lot of snow and ice.
The stars. Interesting story, most likely due to the fact that it is based on a real one. Two stars. Decent acting all around. One star. Pacing, while definitely not as fast as one would expect from a more exciting film, was highly appropriate for the film. One star. The whales were pretty cool. One star. They managed to not turn the movie into a tribute to the decade I hate the most, the 80’s. One star. The director (Ken Kwapis-Licensed to Wed, He’s Just Not That Into You, the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants) really managed to draw the audience in and give us reasons to care about both the whales and the human characters. Well done IMO. One star. Overall a fun movie. One star. Total: eight stars.
The black holes. I found Drew Barrymore’s character an annoying off the stereotype shelf hippy Greenpeace bitch, and she felt really fake and out of place in comparison to the rest of the cast. Odds are Drew didn’t eat anything at all during the course of this film production as she managed to fill up every day by chewing the scenery. One black hole. In the real story the Inuits made the decision to help the whales on their own, but in this movie they couldn’t do anything that positive until the white man, in the form of Adam Carlson, guided them into the correct moral choice. I would find that a little insulting if I were an Eskimo. One black hole. Total: two black holes.
A final total of six stars. Really decent movie. Perfect for your family (to be honest I’m not even sure how it got a PG rating). This might also be the perfect date movie. Interesting, with whales, romance, drama, and some sadness. If this doesn’t warm your dates heart maybe she needs someone to cut her an ice hole (ok, I’m done with that). On the other hand, very little of the camera work really needs to be seen on a big screen, so feel free see it on NetFlix.
I’m seeing the Woman in Black later tonight, so look for a review tomorrow. It looks as scary as hell, and I’m in a bad spot as I am seeing it with two girls and don’t want to end up shrieking or otherwise embarrassing myself. I’d like to maintain at least the illusion of machismo in my life. Anyway, thanks for reading. Follow me on Twitter @NerdKungFu. Talk to you all tomorrow.
Dave
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