A Guide to Nerd Guys Meeting and Dating Women: Shoes
I realized something important several years ago that really opened my eyes: women really notice shoes. Think about it. Most guys have at most 2 or 3 pairs. According to Reuters the average woman owns 19 pairs of shoes (which means there are women out there with 50 or 60 pairs). I think it fair to say that women pay attention to shoes (I have theories as to why this is, but won’t get into it here).
This is where most guys fail miserably (Epic Fail image courtesy of the movie t shirt category). Most guys (not just nerds) default to the most comfortable pair they have.
Think about it for a minute. Not only do women own a couple dozen pairs of shoes, but they learn to walk in some of the most uncomfortably footwear items ever invented. High heels are no joke (if you don’t believe me walk around on your tip toes for ten minutes and see how you feel). It’s like the Marquis de Sade was a fashion designer. They do this in order to look good, and you are going to schlep around in a pair of ratty old sneakers and expect to impress the ladies? It is to laugh.
Therefore, you are under an obligation to to not only have good shoes, but several pairs of good shoes. Let me list what I think any guy who is trying to date women should have.
1. Sneakers of some kind. There are definite times when you need to wear something casual. The important thing is that the shoes need to be clean and in good repair. I generally go for skateboard shoes in black. They tend to be very comfortable, nigh indestructible, and by being black can go with a lot of stuff.
2. Running or hiking shoes. Even if you don’t run (and really, you should) women love hiking as an activity and you need to be ready. Nothing will make you look like a tool than going on a romantic hike and having to bail out because you have a massive blister or something. Also, running is a great way to both lose weight and meet women.
3. Brown leather shoes. These are NOT your dress shoes. These are shoes you can wear with jeans or slacks when you are not necessarily wanting to look formal but are not casual. I have a pair of Ecco Unlimited shoes that look great and feel good.
4. Two pairs of dress shoes. One black, one a deep color. I have a pair of deep burgundy shoes that look good. Slacks and suits. Buy belts to match each color shoes you have.
5. Sandals. I know I said to avoid sandals, but there are some times when they are appropriate. This times are at the beach or pool. Generally go with something simple, but absolutely avoid Birkenstocks. And never socks. If it is cold enough for socks put on some damned shoes.
This is the minimum every guy should have, but you can’t go wrong having more pairs. I have a friend who has 150 or more pairs and he always looks sharp. More pairs gives you options of matching your clothes better.
Let me add a few notes. First of all, with the exception of sandals, socks should be worn at all time. Some fashion mags like to tell guys to go sockless with dress shoes but honestly, don’t try it. It just looks gross. Also, except for your athletic shoes go with black or dark socks. Showing a band of white around your ankles with your dark pants and shoes is the express train to lameville.
Learn to polish your shoes (or find someone who can do it for you). Buy ceder shoe trees for your dress shoes. Store them on a shelf, not a pile.
Finally, never be seen in public without shoes. Barefoot is only for kids, homeless guys, and gross Burning Man tree hugging hippies. If that is the look you are going for why are you even reading this?
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