Welcome to Remake Hell: Escape from New York
Yes, in the hopes of sucking more money from the current generations wallets (and just plain sucking) Hollywood is developing a remake of the great Escape from New York. This is aggravating on a whole new level, as everyone knows it was truly Kurt Russell as Snake Priskin who made this movie (I could find an Escape image in the Movie T-Shirt category, but I did find this cool Pork-Chop Express one from Big Trouble in Little China). Rumored actors include Tom Hardy and Jason Stratham, who are both fine in their own genres but honestly I really don’t believe either of them can really pull off the truly bad ass, one eyed, gravely Snake that is required.
In addition, the time is all wrong for this movie. Like when they did Red Dawn the point is the circumstances have changed, making the major plot point of the film (Russia invading USA) seem a little ridiculous. When Escape was made New York City was in a downward slump crime wise that made the idea of the entire island of Manhattan being turned into a penal colony entirely reasonable. Today Manhattan is the most prime real estate in the USA and there is no way the base premise is going to make sense or seem at all serious. If you really want to do this you should make Escape from Detroit (no offense to my fine Detroit readers, but you get my point).
Anyway, I found a list of other bad remake plans so look forward to more of these post as I explain why each of them is going to suck. I might have to revisit this one again soon.
Dave
