Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 51 By Any Other Name
For me this will always be the cuboctahedtral styrofoam block episode. Also the episode that proves that not all red shirts who die are male. I remember being actually shocked when Yeoman Thompson was the red shirt killed by Rojan. I thought nothing ever bad happened to hot girls in mini skirt Starfleet uniforms. Of course now that I think about it Yeoman Tina Lawton got turned into an iguana in Charlie X and Lt. Tracy got eviscerated in Wolf in the Fold, but for some reason when I saw this girl get killed I was truly surprised. Maybe because it was on an away mission?
This was also the episode that taught me the value of backless tops for women. If Kelinda is how the women look in the Kelven Empire sign me up. Of course when Spock was describing what he perceived as their real form it was pretty much a female Cthulu. Not sure how much a backless top would enhance that.
Here’s a weird question. The Kelvens make modifications to the warp drive to improve it dramatically. Didn’t Scott see anything that might have lead to an improvement? Sure they took all their gear with them but someone should have noticed something. Don’t they have security cameras of some kind on the Enterprise?
Sorry I was just looking at some images from the episode and lost about 30 minutes looking at pictures of Kelinda. I think I need to add her to my list of favorite Trek girls. Damn she was hot. Actress Barbara Bouchet comes from what is now the Czech Republic. I think I need to take a vacation there.
I just realized that this episode and The Omega Glory were back to back not only in release order but production and they both involved humans reduced to their base elements sans water. I guess if you are a writer on Star Trek and you come across an interesting idea you beat that dead horse until another script blelches forth. There is definite script trending in this show and no one thought of maybe saving the same idea for later on down the road. Oh well.
By the way a friend of mine writes a nerd mommy blog called Domestic Geek Girl and reviewed this onesie from our Star Trek T Shirt collection. I wanted to give her a shout so check out the review she wrote (also her baby is super cute in this thing. Definitely a future Janeway). If you are a mom and a nerd you will probably get a lot from her words.
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 53 The Ultimate Computer
Star Trek has long been sited as the herald of most of our current technology. Cell phones, tablets, video streaming, virtual reality, even modern computers were first presented to Americans thanks to this show. In this episode we see the first stab at Artificial Intelligence (AI).
However what I love about this episode is not the presentation of M-5 as the future of computing but rather how brilliantly a space battle can be presented even without the benefits of CGI or even a special effects budget. You really feel the action of M-5 crushing the Lexington and the Excalibur from the bridge without needing to see the actual ships in action. I honestly think this was best done in Balance of Terror, but still very well done here.
(Image courtesy of the Star Trek T-Shirt category)
One thing however that I have always found annoying about Star Trek space battles is the image of crew members being thrown around the bridge and bulkheads. I know they stole that from Run Silent Run Deep and every other submarine movie but the fact is at the relative speeds they were running at anything capable of overcoming whatever the Enterprise used as inertial dampeners wouldn’t have thrown them across the room; it would have left a thin red smear on the bulkhead. Sorry Star Trek. I still love you but this has always bugged me.
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 54 Bread and Circuses
This was a favorite of mine as a kid. I studied a lot of Greek and Roman mythology back then (long story) and the idea of a planet where Rome never fell struck me as super cool. I particularily liked the Roman soldiers in ancient armor with submachineguns.
All that being said this episode was pretty dumb. The idea of planets developing exactly parallel histories or societies as Earth but with some slight difference had already been ground into the dust in The Omega Glory, Patterns of Force, and a Piece of the Action. If you add in all the time travel episodes, Miri, and the Squire of Gothos you would think that Star Trek faced some kind of budget issue and were writing stories that would allow them to use props, costumes, and sets that were lying around the studio grounds.
I think it also telling that all the “alternative Earth” episodes were all close together. I would bet they did A Piece of the Action and figured out this was a cool and easy way to crank out a few episodes. All kind of ridiculous (even if the universe is infinite and all possible worlds exist in it the odds of finding a parallel world even in our own galaxy are astronomically high), but not as ridiculous as finding out that every alien planet in the universe speaks American accented English.
This was the only one I can think of that had a real religious message and if you are not Christian you might have an issue with it. I love the fact that Spock thinks that “sun worshipers” are kind of silly but once Uhura explains that they are not worshiping the sun but rather the Son of God he thinks it makes logical sense. I kind of doubt a race dedicated to logic in all things would give any more credence to one religious belief over another, but whatever. I think that basing a whole “plot twist” on the similarity between two English words on a planet that has no business even speaking English is bass ackwards. Also, for the record the Roman Empire did not fall because of Christianity. It fell for a number of reasons, not the least of which include lead in the water supply and Germanic barbarians.
Still, a fun episode as long as you don’t look too carefully at Kirk taking advantage Drusilla, his one night sex slave. This whole episode was pretty much based on human trafficking, but given the fact that Kirk has the charisma to hook up with any female vertebrates (and most invertebrates, if they are clean) in his eyesight this is just being lazy (and creepy).
Dave
P.S. I just noticed that the image I pulled from the site lists this episode as number 43, which again was it’s production number but not its release number. That’s twice. I’m going to have to have a few words with my Star Trek t shirt people.
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 55 Assignment: Earth
This episode has always been something of a mystery to me. Think about it. The studio was planning on getting ready to cancel Star Trek (and only the timely intervention of Nichelle Nichols and thousands of loyal fans saved it for one more season) yet thought it worthy of launching a spin off. Of course the failure of Gary Seven to inspire mass fan loyalty might have been the final straw that broke the studios love of Trek in the first place.
Gary Seven himself is a big mystery too. He was a human raised by aliens to do something (?) on Earth. He is supposed to be undercover but has the last name of Seven 
(? Could it be the aliens who raised him were the Borg??? Borg logo courtesy of the Star Trek T-Shirts category BTW), not exactly a normal name. Also was his technology more advanced or less advanced that the Enterprise? Why when the Enterprise returned to its own time did they not say “Umm, we found evidence that advanced aliens were screwing with human society at the end of the 20th century. It’s possible they may still be around.”? Wouldn’t that be worthy of the slightest investigation? For that matter why didn’t Gary Seven go screaming back to his alien superiors about a human ship from 300 years in the future mucking about?
Really, everything about this episode is total ass. It had already been established in City on the Edge of Forever and Tomorrow is Yesterday that the slightest change in the past could completely destroy the future from whence the time travelers came back yet they risk destroying their entire reality in the interest of…historical research? I had no idea that historical accuracy would be such a priority in the future. I guess the United Federation of Planets was founded by Wikipedia.
Also, this episode is completely recycled from like eight other episodes. Tomorrow is Yesterday is the obvious one, but an intelligent black cat who turns into a hot brunette woman? Catspaw, anyone? It’s clear that the other time travel episodes had garnered enough praise to make them try one more time. Too bad this one fell on it’s face. This episode also had a very Doctor Who feel to it, so I give it an F+ for originality.
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 56 Spock’s Brain
In all things there is a low point. The bottom level, the dregs, the rock bottom, the nadir, the Phantom Menace. Being alive is about making relative value judgements and as soon as you start doing that there always ends up a low man on the totem pole. For Star Trek that low point will always be Spock’s Brain.
Where to start? The bad direction, the misogamy, the slavery, the line “Brain and brain, what is brain?”. Ironic that this would be the first episode of the dreaded third season. Talk about setting a tone. The great Leonard Nimoy put it best “Frankly during the entire shooting of that episode, I was embarrassed.” We fans are embarrassed with you.
The image of McCoy getting his brain reprogrammed comes from our Star Trek t-shirt category BTW.
The weird thing is as a kid I thought it was pretty cool. I mean, I was smart enough to recognize “Balance of Terror” and “City on the Edge of Forever” as the zenith of sci fi entertainment, but being a preteen watching this in the mid ’70s it didn’t seem so off. The idea that women were beautiful dummies who stole from men and controlled them with pain seemed a reasonable premise to me (thanks for that, Dad, and I guess I just had a major revelation as to the difficulties I face in my current dating life). If nothing else I like to think that my changed attitude towards this episode is a microcosm of my own evolution into the open minded, balanced supporter of feminism and equality you see before you.
I’ll have to remember that line when I’m telling my future (and very hypothetical) girlfriend to run out the kitchen and make me a sandwich. Of course when speaking of future and hypothetical girlfriends the terms “cyborg”, “virtual”, “android”, and “elfin” tend to creep into my thought process. God I’m a nerd.
Anyway, bad episode but the good news is I am now done with season 3 and can move on to the much better season 2. What was the last episode from season 2 for me to cast my fond memories over? Assignment Earth??? Why God why???
Dave
Star Trek Restrospective: Episode 57 the Enterprise Incident
I talked a lot about this episode when it made number 4 on my list of the 10 worst and then later went on to write an entire blog post as to why I thought it was so dumb. All those reasons still stand. I’ve noticed that most of the really bad episodes from season 3 all seem to involve making Kirk out to be even more awesome than previously portrayed. If I were a betting man I would bet that in S3 Shatner had gained a lot of power editorially and more or less forced them to write him this way. Either that or they made the determination that it was easier to cater to his ego than argue with him.
That is not to say there isn’t some amusement to be had from this episode, and I’m not just talking about Kirks Romulan makeup. At the start of season 3 NBC dramatically cut the budget and the producers had to scramble to make their props. When looking at the Romulan cloaking device a particularly observant Star Trek fan might notice that it seems a little familiar; specifically it is the top half of Nomad from the Changeling glued to one of the glowing soul globes from Return to Tomorrow (Sargon, I think). It is these keen insights that make my blog so worth reading.
By the way, if you yourself are a keen observer you might notice that this image from the Star Trek T Shirt collection lists this episode as 59, not 57. I believe this to be an error on the part of the guys who do my shirts. It was the 59th episode produced but in terms of intended and actual release order it was 57. I could already hear the trolls sharpening their keyboards on that one. You won’t catch me so easily.
Anyway, kind of a dopey episode. Read the link I put above if you want specifics. Of course in looking ahead my next two episodes are Spock’s Brain and Assignment: Earth so it will be a while before I get to something decent. Oh, well.
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 58 the Paradise Syndrome
Another one that made my list of worst TOS episodes. This episode garnered a lot of criticism for racism and I can’t say I disagree. It drank the Native American stereotype punch and then regurgitated it all over the screen. Kirk as the white male is in all ways smart and capable while the Native Americans are dopey savages. If I were Native American and saw the people and custumes in this one I think I would punch the first guy I saw wearing Spock ears on general principal.
Ironically this was exactly the opposite of what Gene was trying to do. I think they just didn’t look at this one carefully enough. By the way right now I’m looking at a photo of Kirk about to kiss Miramanee while wearing a costume reject from a Native American casino and I can honestly say he has never looked cheesier. That is saying a ton. I am a massive Kirk fan of course but I am not blind to his limitations and some of his episodes are harder to be a fan of than others.
Also, what the hell is the deal with Miramanee dying of internal injuries with McCoy standing there? Unless your internal injury happens to be the complete removal of your heart and lungs there is tons of stuff any decent modern doctor could try. Was he too busy to help the primitive savage? Next time why don’t they just beam down a bunch of plague blankets and be done with it?
Of course, I’m pretty sure McCoy has said “He’s dead, Jim” about 50 more times than he’s said “He’s made a full recovery, Jim.” When you really think about it how good was Dr. McCoy really? Seems like his only real skill is determining if someone is dying or already dead. (McCoy image courtesy of the Star Trek T-Shirt category).
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 61 Spectre of the Gun
Now we are looking good. This episode is easily my favorite of Season 3 and made number 3 on my top 10 list. When I flash back to my childhood and the images that stick with me the shot of Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and Scotty at the OK Corral standing in front of the wood fence while Wyatt Earp and his gang shoot through them into the fence is near the top of the list.
I also think this is an episode which shows how well the Star Trek crew did their best with no budget. They basically borrowed a bunch of props from the western being filmed in the next studio and built their set with like $200 worth of 2x4s. By writing the unreal nature of the reality the crew was dealing with these budget limitations enhanced rather than detracted from image. The familiarity of the old West set combined with the unfinished buildings showing the orange alien sky was pretty awesome.
I also think that this episode had some of the best camera work of the series. Watch the scene leading up to the gunfight and you will see use of camera angle and perspective that is really impressive. Of course a lot of it is old hat now but this was 40 years ago. They really did some very cool things with the camera and limited special effects.
Finally, this is another Star Trek episode that predicted the future of human technology. Specifically they predicted the creation of virtual reality, or at least video game avatars. If only the show hadn’t been cancelled who knows where we would be technologically? Of course by the end of Season 3 we were seeing Abe Lincoln in space so odds are Seasons 4 and 5 would have had stories that make most Star Trek /slash porn seem reasonable.
Image courtesy of the Star Trek T Shirt category.
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 62 Day of the Dove
This is one of my favorite episodes from season 3. As a kid I just liked all the violence. The Klingon commander was pretty awesome, and had one of my favorite quotes from all of Star Trek:
Kirk: Go to the devil!
Commander Kang: We have no devil, Kirk. But we understand the habits of yours. I shall torture you to death one by one until your noble captain cries enough. Who will be first?
Spoken with the perfect amount of menace. I also love any episode where Spock has to use logic and propose hypothesis. (I couldn’t find a good image of Kang in the Star Trek T-Shirts, but I did find Kor).
It’s also funny how your perceptions change over time. As a kid and young adult I never really had much of a problem with the interaction between Chekov and Mara, but now as an adult and much more open minded and sensitive individual (yes I am, dammit! Shut up!) I now realize it was pretty much the first part of a rape and find it seriously disturbing. Of course Chekov was under the influence of an alien creature, but still. Not something I’m happy to see one of my childhood heroes doing.
I’d also like it noted that even as a kid I noticed that the mysterious “Security Alert” button that Kirk touched on his communicator was in fact just him tapping the side of the device. I love Star Trek but am not blind to it’s stupidities.
Dave
Star Trek Retrospective: Episode 63 For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky
This episode has always been one of great confusion for me. I never actually saw it as a kid. The network that showed my Start Trek reruns opted out of doing this one (and a few more I guess). The thing is I used to buy up sci fi paperbacks at the thrift store for $.10 each and anything with the word Star Trek on it went home with me. I once picked up a book of episodes and read them back to back. When I got to this this one I had my first very horrible moment of doubt as to my validity as a Trekker (that moment would be repeated ad nauseum at my first five Star Trek conventions). How could I have not seen this episode? Is it possible I had forgotten it?
This is one of those episodes that looks a lot better written down than actually performed. I quite enjoyed the story and found the concept fascinating. Generation ships is probably exactly how we are going to colonize the universe so it is highly relevant. Seen on the screen in the order that the show was presented had a much lower enjoyment factor. Pacing was really kind of off, Kirk hammed it up even more than usual, and the costumes looked like the props guy raided his mothers sleepwear collection. Also the concept of a primitive society being under the thrall of a super computer had been so beaten into the ground that as a trope it was only outdone by the Red Shirt dying a horrible death. (Ensign Ricky image courtesy of the Star Trek T-Shirt collection)
That being said a bad day of watching Star Trek beats a good day of most anything else. To be honest more mediocre than bad, and the whole brain hook up thing was another Star Trek technological prophesy about to come to fruition (cough cough Google Glass cough cough).
Dave
