The Muppets Movie Review
For once, my sense of nostalgia managed to beat down my sense of cynicism.
Odds are I should have seen Hugo, as that would have helped maintain my nerd credibility, but the fact is I used to watch the Muppets as a kid and loved it. If there is a puppet character on the planet greater than Gonzo the Great then I will eat one my my t-shirts. I loved almost all of them. Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Beeker, Scooter, the Swedish Chef, Animal, Link Hogthrob, Lew Zealand (and his boomerang fish), Sam the Eagle, Statler and Waldorf; just listing them here puts a smile on my face. Ironically it was the main characters who annoyed me. Miss Piggy drove me berzerk, Fozzie the Bear I wanted to stuff into a microwave, and even Kermit the Frog bugged me. I liked him, but he was such a wimp sometimes it drove me nuts. Also, the romance between a hideous hog in a blond wig and makeup and a bug eyed frog kind of made me cringe.
However, the secondary characters always carried me through, and before you really get into this review understand that I will be writing it while viewing through rose colored nostalgia glasses. To be honest, I laughed my ass off throughout the film. For those of you who are regular readers and see this as completely divergent from my normal style rest assured that the next horrible script that comes across the screen I will jump on twice as hard for all the good things I say about this one.
Anyway, this movie starts off badly, actually, with the introduction of a new Muppet character named Walter, who is growing up in Smalltown USA with the two script anchors, his brother Gary (Jason Segel – How I Met Your Mother, 
Forgetting Sarah Marshal, Despicable Me. How I Met Your Mother image courtesy of the TV Show T Shirt category) and Gary’s girlfriend Mary (Amy Adams- Enchanted, the Fighter, Catch Me if You Can). Walter is a super Muppet fan, while Gary is is big brother who keeps more or less neglecting his girlfriend in order to help take care of his brother. They are taking a bus trip to LA to visit Muppet studios. At this point my early warning suckage alarm was blaring in my ear. However, while on the tour of the abandoned, decrepit, crumbling Muppet Studio Walter sneaks into Kermit’s old office and overhears a meeting between the great duo of Statler and Waldorf, in the process of selling the studio off to Tex Richman (Chris Cooper-American Beauty, the Bourne Identity, the Patriot) who plans to demolish the place and drill for oil. After finally giving the plot a kick start Walter tracks down Kermit and convinces him to reunite the whole gang to do a telethon to save the studio. At that point we go into a series of funny “where are they now” scenes the eventually morphs into a montage. I don’t want to give a lot away, but the one that made me laugh the hardest was seeing Scooter working at Google. Hilarious.
They managed to convince a TV executive (Super hot Rashida Jones-Parks and Recreation, the Social Network, I Love You, Man. She was looking a lot better than she did as a lesbian in Our Idiot Brother) to give them two hours to run their show. Muppet hijinks ensue. Jack Black (School of Rock, Tropic Thunder) gets kidnapped to be the celebrity host and managed to not annoy me. A ton of celebrity cameos surface to operate the telethon phones. Zach Galifianakis plays a local homeless man (not much of an acting stretch, although I like him a lot). The cameo list is really impressive, and it’s not just a bunch of washed up losers. Really cool.
The story progresses. The show has some great Muppet skits. I laughed a lot. The characters frequently break the fourth walls in really clever and funny ways. I left the theater smiling.
The stars. The Muppets. Two stars. Story, characters, and dialog mostly true to the original show. Three stars. A PG film that felt appropriate at PG. One star. A couple of scenes in particular, especially the Gonzo the Great recruitment scene and the Scooter thing, had me really laughing. One star. A few of the skits for the final show were worthy of the original show, just done with higher production values. One star. The celebrity cameos actually added a lot rather than slowing things down. One star. All puppets. No attempt to render in CGI or make them cartoons, live action cartoons, or anything in between (that would have ruined this film on about 14 levels. Suck it, Alvin and the Chipmunks). One star. Overall, super fun. Two stars. Total: twelve stars.
Now the black holes. I will admit that there were issues with this film that I would have pushed a lesser film off a subway platform for, but my enjoyment of the movie has helped me do a mental wash over most of them. I will focus on the really glaring ones. The biggest flaw this movie suffers from is the same one that plagues all of the Transformers movies: too much of humans, not enough of Muppets (or, in the case of Transformers, robots). If you recall the show the humans were always at most ancillary characters who mostly there just to highlight how cool the Muppets were (IMO), and there was never more than one. Here, there are entire scenes and horrible song and dance numbers featuring only humans. Two black holes. Introducing a new Muppet as the protagonist who is really kind of bland and boring, with nothing notably about him at all. This is what happens when you don’t have Jim Henson involved. One black hole. That’s it. Three black holes.
So a grand total of nine black holes, and my hearty endorsement. Go see this film. Take your kids. They will love it. If you grew up in the 80’s this will rock for you, and the humor is sophisticated enough to keep an adult entertained. Good date movie? Absolutely. If your date isn’t laughing, feeling good, and having her inhibitions lowered by this film leave her at the theater as odds are she is really a serial killer looking to gut and make a new skin suit out of you as soon as you get alone.
Thanks for reading. I will probably see Hugo tonight at the Grand Lake Cinema and write it up tomorrow. I also saw the Descendants and have some funny thoughts about that film, but I there is so much good stuff out right now I think I will save it for Sunday. Follow me on Twitter @NerdKungFu. Thanks again. Talk to you all later.
Dave
